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The free guide from Steph, almost ten years dating with HSV. How to bring it up so it feels light and natural, how to practise saying it, and the suppression tips that have worked for me after almost ten years of trial and error.

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P.S. My anonymous support group + live Q+A (Tuesdays for women, Thursdays for men) is waiting inside the guide 💌

How To Tell Them You Have Herpes, Without It Feeling Like A Confession

The free guide that walks you through “the talk”, from someone who’s had it for almost ten years. Plus the suppression tips that have worked for me through a decade of trial and error. Your future didn’t shrink. Let’s go get it back.

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It was never a question of whether they’ll still want you.

Telling someone you have herpes isn’t asking for permission to be wanted. It never was.

It’s one part of a conversation adults already have before sex. Birth control. When you were last tested. What you’re both looking for.

Herpes is one more heads-up on that list.

Not a spotlight. Not a confession. Housekeeping.

Is this you?

  • You’ve rehearsed the worst version of the talk at 2am. More than once.
  • You’ve met someone you actually like. And that’s the problem.
  • You told one person, it went badly, and now you’re quietly done with dating.
  • You’ve read r/Herpes until it made everything worse.
  • Your doctor gave you a prescription and nothing to say.

If even one of those landed, the guide was written for you.

What’s in the guide

The reframe. Why telling someone is a conversation, not a confession, and why the energy you bring is the energy they mirror.

The filter. How they respond tells you about their capacity, not your worth. The talk is the fastest compatibility test there is.

The trap. The quiet pull to make herpes the reason for every bad date. How to spot it and say no.

The practice. How to say it out loud until it stops sounding like a question and starts sounding like a sentence.

The essentials. What I’ve learned to keep on hand after almost a decade of trial and error. My experience, not medical advice.

Just the conversations your bestie would’ve had with you if she’d already been through it 💌

Where are you right now?

“I’ve got a conversation coming up.”

A date this weekend. Someone you want to hook up with. Start here.

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“I told someone and it went badly.”

You don’t need a pep talk. You need people who’ve been there. The guide shows you how to join my anonymous support group.

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“I just want to talk to people who get it.”

Anonymous, live, every week. Tuesdays for women, Thursdays for men. Details are in the guide.

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What actually happens when you tell someone

“I sat up all night just scrolling your TT & built the courage. I told him and it wasn’t bad at all, he doesn’t even care, and this made me like 100x more confident.”

TikTok user

“I brought it up like it was something really casual… he just went ‘okay, I don’t mind’ like it was the most normal thing ever, and then a few seconds later asked if we could still kiss. It was such a relief.”

One-on-One Client, August 2026

“This should be paid for. It’s amazing, girl.”

Guide reader, August 2026

My numbers. In almost ten years, I’ve had two bad responses. One guy turned out to be cheating. The other turned out to live with his mom. Herpes didn’t lose me anyone worth keeping. It just showed me who they were faster.

The research. In one UK study of people with herpes, 83% of disclosures didn’t end in rejection.1 Forums make it feel like the opposite, because the bad stories get posted and the good ones don’t.

1 Nicholson & O’Farrell, Int J STD AIDS 2021. A survey of 461 Herpes Viruses Association members.

What happens after you sign up

1. Check your inbox. The guide arrives within minutes. It comes from Steph Storie, with the subject line “your guide is here 💌”. Nothing in your inbox says herpes.

2. Read it tonight. It’s one email, not a course. One sitting.

3. Hit reply. Tell me what’s going on. I read and reply to every email.

What’s waiting inside

The guide is the start. Inside you’ll also find:

  • How to join my anonymous support group + live Q+A
  • First word on the word-for-word disclosure scripts I’m building
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Questions

Yes. The sender is Steph Storie and no subject line ever says herpes. Unsubscribe in one click, any time.

No. It’s lived experience from almost ten years with HSV. For diagnosis, treatment, transmission or pregnancy questions, talk to a licensed clinician.

Yes. If the conversation is still the thing in the way, it’s for you.

I write as a woman, mostly for women. The guide works for anyone, and there’s a men’s support group on Thursdays.

Nothing. It’s an email from me. No card, no catch.

Questions? steph@yourbestiesguide.com

The talk is coming either way. Walk in ready.

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Private · no subject line ever says herpes